|One of many lunatic conspiracy theorist Jesse Venturea|
"Agenda 21" is one of a number of silly but dangerous conspiracy theories sweeping through the fever sewer swamps of the political right.... Agenda 21 is just a blueprint for sustainable development, especially in emerging economies. It outlines how wealthier countries can contribute to smarter growth through technology transfers and public education. It stresses the importance of fighting deforestation and conserving bio-diversity -- all things that normal people would consider wise. But hey we are dealing with the "know nothings" right?
Consider what's happening right here in my own back yard -Virginia's Middle Peninsula, which is on the western shore of the Chesapeake Bay, which is among the areas in the U.S. most vulnerable to climate change. Earlier this month, Darryl Fears, reporting for the Washington Post, offered a glimpse into the madness that city planners have faced in recent months as a local tea bagging group, convinced that a nefarious plot by scientists and city officials is afoot, have disrupted their work trying to mitigate the potential impacts of rising sea levels.
My local teabaggers (Gloucester Virginia) have been flocking in droves to the Agenda 21 bandwagon. It's caused a few feathers to be ruffled in my area - an area that is normally your everyday dull city planning and board meetings which contain nonessential ordinances . As Stephanie Mencimer reported for Mother Jones, "Agenda 21 paranoia has swept the teapublican scene, driving activists around the country to delve into the minutiae of local governance... they're descending on planning meetings and transit debates, wielding PowerPoints about Agenda 21, and generally freaking out low-level bureaucrats with accusations about their roles in a supposed international conspiracy."
The truth about AGENDA 21:
"The important thing to understand readers about Agenda 21 is that there is absolutely nothing binding or compelling member countries to implement any part of it. It's not a treaty -- it is entirely voluntary and certainly doesn't have any connection to local governments. Yet for the teapublcians, with its long John Birch Society undercurrent of paranoia about international institutions, Agenda 21 represents some kind of dark UN conspiracy to impose socialism on the "free world."
Agenda 21 has been a long time conspiracy theory of long time useful idiot Glenn Beck.
In lieu of this ignorance and stupidity, we at NFTOS thought we'd select 21 idiotic teapublican conspiracy theories. So keeping up with our 'countdown theme" week here we go. Teapublican conspiracy theories:
The Nazis are everywhere
That a group of "community organizers" called ACORN stuffed the ballot boxes for Obama in 2008.
The CIA experimented on individuals with LSD without the subjects knowledge in a project known as Project MKULTRA.
JFK was killed at the behest of Lyndon Johnson, or the Mafia, or the Communists, or the Vatican, or...
Bill and Hillary Clinton had 50 people murdered, and got off scot-free.
The whole world is run by a group trying to create some form of New World Order.
The leaders of the US, Mexico, and Canada are conspiring to merge all three countries into the North American Union and adopt the Amero as a common currency, for... some reason.
United States flags which have gold trim around them represent a different country, or are an attempt by the Jews/Masons/bankers/etc. to destroy American sovereignty. Also argued by tax protesters to signal that a court is under maritime law, a common argument in pseudolaw.
The United Nations is a conspiracy by them to eliminate and invade sovereign nations with 'peacekeeper' troops to create a World Government/New World Order.
The United Nations is secretly bringing white UN military vehicles into the USA to overthrow the Government.
Thousands of Chinese troops are massing on the Mexican border to invade the USA.
The entire left wing movement as it exists today is run by Moveon.Org and the DailyKos, and is funded by George Soros.
The swine flu outbreak of 2009 was engineered by the American government, with the eventual aim of declaring martial law, herding everyone into FEMA concentration camps, and forcibly vaccinating people with the virus in order to deliberately depopulate the Earth so that the masterminds of the New World Order can take control.
FEMA Concentration Camps
‘Door-to-Door’ Gun Confiscations
The Federal Reserve Conspiracy
Egypt Caliphate Conspiracy Theory
The Volokh Conspiracy
Yes I know that's 22 conspiracy theories....facts are, I researched over 150 republican conspiracy theories.
On Glenn Beck's radio show, the 'beckistan" responded to those accusing him of wild “conspiracy theories” connecting the extreme left and extreme Islam in the wake of the Egyptian unrest — and he used three simple, succinct sentences to do so:
“I want the left to know, I plant my flag in this soil. If I’m wrong, so be it,” he said before laying out his case. “And you can discredit me all you want for the end of time, but I’m telling you I’m not wrong on this one. And there are three points that I want to make sure are very clear.”
Sentence one: “Groups from the hardcore socialist left, and extreme Islam will work together because of the common enemy of Israel.”
Sentence two: “Groups from the hardcore socialist left and extreme Islam will work together because of the common enemy of capitalism.”
Sentence three: “Groups from the hardcore socialist left, and extreme Islam will work together to overturn relative stability, because in the status quo, they are both ostracized from power and the mainstream in most of the world.”
I guess that just about sums it up readers. Don't leave your home, hoard food, weapons, and a Glenn Beck survival kit so that your assured to endure the plethora of teabagging conspiracy theories to hit your community.
If you got to this site you can generate a myriad of your own teapublican conspiracy theories, here is just a smattering:
"tyrannical tree-huggers are meeting behind closed doors with intent to shoot puppies on the White House lawn".
"the liberal media lapdogs don't want you to know that they have formed a secret society to that plans to create a one world government that will enslave us all".See how ludicrous this all is Mathews and Gloucester Counties of Virginia? Agenda 21 is about as absolute, (actual, authentic, bodily, bona fide, certain, concrete, corporal, corporeal, de facto, embodied, essential, evident, existent, existing, factual, firm, heartfelt, honest, in the flesh, incarnate, indubitable, intrinsic, irrefutable, legitimate, live, material, original, palpable, perceptible, physical, positive, present, right, rightful, sensible, sincere, solid, sound, stable, substantial, substantive, tangible, true, unaffected, undeniable, undoubted, unfeigned, valid, veritable) as me crapping a million dollars out of my posterior!
'the obamanazis occupying the White House are plotting with terrorist to operate concentration camps right here on American soil".
So the next time you hear a teabagging teapublican wingnut spewing feverish nonsense about "climategate" or the "globalist agenda," remember that this is not just fodder for late-night TV monologues, it 's your community falling back to the 1700's. Where are those witches when you need them?