BILL AND TED'S NOT SO EXCELLENT ADVENTURE

After listening to part of Ted Cruz‘s 21-hour Nazi-invoking filibuster, Jon Stewart was convinced that whatever Cruz was speaking out against must be nothing less than the zombie apocalypse. So he was more than a little confused at how Cruz was going on about Obamacare, mocking Cruz’s constant tangents and his apparent lack of seriousness about really solving America’s health care crisis.

And, of course, the Dr. Seuss.

Cruz pledged to talk until he could stand no more. Stewart shot back, “Easy for you to take that kind of physical risk, you have government health care.”

Stewart went through all the bizarre pop culture references Cruz made, from Ashton Kutcher and Duck Dynasty to White Castle and Star Wars. But what really killed Stewart was Cruz’s somewhat ironic invocation of Green Eggs and Ham.

“So to express your opposition to Obamacare, you go to the book about a stubborn jerk who decides he hates something before he’s tried it, and when he finally gets a taste, he has to admit after he’s tasted it, ‘This is pretty fucking good.’”

Stewart then went after Cruz on the specifics of his health care objections, and ended the segment with an epic reading of a fake Dr. Seuss book called The Bore-ax, containing phrases like “showboatiest blab” and “hours of mouth masturbation.”

BILL AND TED PART I Courtesy of Comedy Central

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,The Daily Show on Facebook

BILL AND TED PART II Courtesy of Comedy Central

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,The Daily Show on Facebook

Cruz is both crazy and emotionally stunted? He is much like Ben Shapiro from GhostBreitbart.com, a man-child who was put on the intellectual fast track to nowhere, thereby freezing his emotional maturity at age fifteen. Ted Cruz, "Rain Man" with an attitude - is a selfish pompous prick.

Ted Cruz is an elitist, male-like version of Sarah Palin - hence why Sarahnoya approves so much of the bombastic right wing nut job.

Those rallying to Cruz's support are as tone-deaf as GOP Chairman Reince Preibus was when he tried to deflect the government shutdown as being something the Democrats were choosing. It was a slight of hand, er, word, and it was transparent, and frankly acted badly.

The stupidity is utterly amazing. The American Taliban is all puffed up and past its peak. They are as deflating now as their hare-brained plan to threaten to harm the country unless they get their way - which has now run its course - again.

Ted Cruz is being criticized from within the clown tent that he is actually a liberal who is trying to destroy the party from within?

The GOP, especially many of the tin foil hat society folk, have traveled so far down the liberalism-is-poison metaphor road that they can't even stand for the deepest principles without being called a fraud. Speaking about trees that are producing bad fruit.

The smorgasbord of incompetence and regression that the GOP puts out daily - is everything ludicrous, and to suggest anything to the contrary, is ludicrous. Conservatives nowadays aren't smart though; they're comparing bureaucracy with Nazism, which, at best, is bad comedy.

I do not like government, GOP-I-Am. 

Would you like it
with clean water?
The EPA checks it for ya' 

I would not, could not, for clean water.
My massive bank account buys me
EU-filtered water. 

A plague! Influenza! Measles, Mumps, and Rubella!
Would you fund the CDC? 

Neither diseases of the common folk
nor health for all, you see
could make me appreciate the CDC. 

Roads, bridges, you drive on them too.
Would you kill - the DOT? 

Soon I'll have not one helicopter, but three, you see.
So drown it in a bathtub, would I the DOT. 

You are rich and elite, so you have no need,
but wouldn't you share a little of your wealth
as a moral good deed? 

Bah, humbug, you're changing the script.
About little people, I just pretend to give a shit. 

The future, your father, Canada helped him out.
Wouldn't you now like to give a hand back? 

You just don't get it, of nothing do I lack,
Re: helping others, for that I have no knack,
All I can say, is
I got mine, Jack! ~Shonagreg

NFTOS
Editor-In-Chief
Roger West

I"M A 35-YEAR OLD VETERAN ON FOOD STAMPS

JASON KIRELL MILITARY AND ON FOOD STAMPS

Story from Huffington Post:

My name is Jason. I turned 35 less than a week ago. My first job was maintenance work at a public pool when I was 17. I worked 40 hours a week while I was in college. I've never gone longer than six months without employment in my life and I just spent the last three years in the military, one of which consisted of a combat tour of Afghanistan.

Oh, and I'm now on food stamps. Since June, as a matter of fact.

Why am I on food stamps?

The same reason everyone on food stamps is on food stamps: because I would very much enjoy not starving.

I mean, if that's okay with you:

· Mr. or Mrs. Republican congressman.

· Mr. or Mrs. Conservative commentator.

· Mr. or Mrs. "welfare queen" letter-to-the-editor author.

· Mr. or Mrs. "fiscal conservative, reason-based" libertarian.

I do apologize for burdening you on the checkout line with real-life images of American-style poverty. I know you probably believe the only true starving people in the world have flies buzzing around their eyes while they wallow away, near-lifeless in gutters.

Hate to burst the bubble, but those people don't live in this country.

I do. And millions like me. Millions of people in poverty who fall into three categories.

Let's call them the "lucky" category, since conservatives seem to think people on welfare have hit some sort of jackpot:

Those living paycheck to paycheck? They're a little lucky.

Those living unemployment check to unemployment check? They're a little luckier.

Those living 2nd of the month to 2nd of the month? Ding! We've hit the jackpot!

The 2nd of the month being the time when funds gets electronically deposited onto the EBT card, [at least in NY] for those who've never been fortunate enough to hit that $175/month Powerball.

I fall into the latter two categories. But I've known people recently -- soldiers in the Army -- who were in the first and third. They were off fighting in Afghanistan while their wives were at home, buying food at the on-post commissary with food stamps.

And nobody bats an eye there, because it's not uncommon in the military.

It's not uncommon -- nor is it shameful. It might be shameful how little service-members are paid, but that's a separate issue.

The fact remains anyone at a certain income level can find it difficult from time to time to pay for everything. And when you're poor you learn to make sacrifices. Food shouldn't be one of them.

The whole concept is un-American. People living here, in the greatest country on Earth, with the most abundant resources, should be forced to go hungry because of the intellectual notion of fiscal conservatism and the ideological notion of self-reliance.

Are you fucking kidding me?

I didn't risk my life in Afghanistan so I could come back and watch people go hungry in America. I certainly didn't risk it so I could come back and go hungry.

Anyone who genuinely supports cutting food stamps is not an intellectual or an ideologue -- they're a bully.

And nobody likes a bully. Except other bullies.

It's time for regular Americans to stand up to these bullies. Not cower in the corner, ashamed of needing help. Because if there's one thing life has taught me, it's that you never know when you'll be the one in need.

I know that the NRA asshat Wayne LaPierre spoke on meet the press this morning, but we at NFTOS have made a decision that this waste of human flesh will not get further air time on our blog.

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West

"PARLIAMENTARY TRICK" IS SUGGESTED BY TIN FOIL HAT SOCIETY LEADER AMY KREMER

AMY KREMER TEABIRCHER RWNJ

For the second time in two days, Al Sharpton battled a conservative on Obamacare and the threat of a government shutdown. Tea Party Express chair Amy Kremer argued that Democrats are the ones who want to shut the government down, but Sharpton didn’t buy it, saying at some point, conservatives need to accept Obamacare is the law of the land and stop trying to take it down.

Watch the video below, via MSNBC:



Kremer argued that even Democrats have said the health care law is “not ready for primetime,” so the goal right now is just to delay. Sharpton went through all the steps of the law being upheld, from Congress approving it to the Supreme Court upholding it to Mitt Romney losing on a platform of repealing it, concluding, “You lost, it’s the law!”

Kremer shot back that Democrats used a “parliamentary trick” to pass it in the first place, while Sharpton brought up all the Republicans who are starting to sour on the defunding idea. Kremer was a lot more bullish, saying the very fact House leadership brought it to the floor is a victory, and citing several red-state Senate Democrats she believes might end up joining the GOP.

Towards the end of the debate, Sharpton pressed Kremer to say that if the Senate rejects the House bill, Congress can go ahead and fund the government without the Obamacare defunding provision. Kremer hedged, insisting the Republicans have no interest in shutting down the government.

Kremer is your A-typical "low-info" voter who found her calling when a non-White president was elected. Kremer is the original "Teabircher", incoherent, hysterical and low on facts. Amy Kremer is living in an alternate reality if she really thinks that a government Shutdown won't have a catastrophic outcome not only in this country, but the global economy as well.


O'REILLY TRYS TO EDUCATE FELLOW TEABIRCHER




Republicans' concern about the problems implementing Obamacare is touching but yet utterly disingenuous all in the same breath.

The synopsis of listening to the tin foil hat society: "We will decide what laws are actually laws!"

The bottom line here is - There is no lead in "pencil lead", there are no grapes and no nuts in "grape nuts", ... and there is nothing patriotic about a "tea party patriot". There is no doubt in this bloggers mind- clear evidence that Teabircher's wear the pants in the conservative family.

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West