NOTHING SAYS GUN SAFETY LIKE DICK CHENEY

Faux News caught up with Dick Cheney this past weekend at the Safari Club International convention for gun owners and manufacturers to find out what the former vice president had to say about the gun safety debate going on in Washington and across the country.

The former vice president, a staunch NRA ally, didn’t deviate significantly from the pro-gun talking points we’ve been hearing. He extolled the virtues of more guns in the classroom by way of armed officers, saying that approach was “probably a more effective deterrent than anything that Congress seems to be debating at the present time.”

Cheney’s own firearms mishap didn’t make it into the conversation.

Remember readers "Dick" made headlines in 2006 when he shot a friend in the face while quail hunting. The accidental injury made Cheney the first vice president since Aaron Burr to shoot someone. (Burr killed his political rival Alexander Hamilton in a duel. He was eventually tried for treason for unrelated reasons.)

CHENEY GIVNG GUN ADVICE



Taking any advice from this troglodyte is scary at best, but gun safety from Cheney, is like taking advice from Adolf Hitler on how to get to heaven.

The cardinal rule of hunting could not be more simple: Don't shoot the people (or the dogs)! Considering Dick Cheney no longer has a pulse, one would think he would want to reflect back on his life - and try not to give advice where he has been truly off the mark - pun intended. Except this is Dick Cheney we’re talking about, a man who has never done anything wrong, a man with no moral compass of his own. Dick Cheney shooting sportsman? - this would be my nomination for oxymoron of the Year.


WILL THE REAL DICK CHENEY PLEASE STAND UP





Cheney tries to invoke real fear in the hearts of many - to include his friends. Understand readers that the guy Dick shot [Harry Whittington] - well he apologized to Cheney for getting in the way of the shot [seriously]! Why do I always hear the Darth Vader theme every time I hear Dick Cheney's name?

HARRY WHITTINGTON'S FACE AFTER BEING SHOT BY DICK CHENEY

Dick, when leaving the Vice Presidency had a whopping 13% approval rating, so why Faux News is seeking this mans advice on gun control? Birds of a feather flock together.

Many Americans loathe this man - Ken Layne of Wonkette speaking on the Dick:

First, it’s not going to be “justice” when Dick Cheney finally drops dead. He’s an old man, a sick & diseased 69-year-old blob of bitter fat and gristle and plastic. If the poisonous toad had been run over by a manure truck about thirty years ago, that would’ve been evidence of the Great Cosmic Wheels of Justice at work, for if such forces existed, they would not be shackled by our puny concepts of time.

Most poisonous toads would find this association to Dick Cheney repulsive. When it comes to "Dick" I often wonder how in the hell does one have a heart attack when one doesn’t actually have a heart? I often wonder how much money the devil actually paid for that soul? I am always reminded of those scenes from the movie Ghost whenever I think of Cheney. You know the scenes, the bad guys die - waiting for the bright light to lead him to the hereafter - and then those nasty shadowy people start coming for him.


SCENE FROM THE MOVIE GHOST



Seriously readers, when this heartless bastard becomes your moral compass on anything - you lose your stance on being considered an intelligent life form! As long as Dick Cheney is stealing oxygen - he shall always remain the slime from the bottom of the cesspool.




NFTOS
Editor-In-Chief
Roger West

WHY DOES OBAMA WANT GUN CONTROL?

Faux News psychiatric analyst Keith Ablow suggested that President Obama‘s philosophy of greater government power and more restrictive gun control results from his being “abandoned again and again” as a child.

Ablow told Dobbs that he believes the president “hijacked” the Newtown shootings “in order to advance his desire for gun control,” which would include “disempowering the individual” in favor of stricter government rules. The president’s views, Ablow said, come from a childhood that included being “abandoned” by people.

“Controlling weapons isn’t going to stop mass killings,” Ablow said, adding that the policy emphasis should be on the “untreated or poorly treated mental illness” he believes causes mass shootings.





Dobbs added that critics generally believe Obama’s solution for every problem is “more government,” the antithesis of “self-reliance” or “independence,” the hallmarks of American values. The two agreed that Obama’s philosophy sees a reliance on the government rather than a reliance on the autonomy of the individual.

Ablow added that “the autonomy of others did [Obama] no favors as a kid, when he was abandoned again and again by people who were — quote, unquote — ‘responsible’ and supposed to do the right thing like parents. So his belief is: ‘You know what? What good is individual autonomy in decision making? What good did it do me? The collective is what needs to be empowered, and all the better if I am the center of that collective and the most powerful person in it.’”

“His solution runs psychologically in the direction of disempowering the individual every single time,” Ablow said, before concluding that “restoring the mental health system” and gun control laws are “diametrically opposed” because one empowers the individual through psychotherapy while the other “disempowers” them and limits their ability to defend themselves.

One has to wonder if Ablow has a real PHD?

I'd like to quote Lewis Black in this instance: "I'm pretty sure letting your kids watch Keith Ablow will turn them into assholes"!



NFTOS
Staff Writer
Steve "Damn Nazi Liberal" Chevapravatdumrong

THAT''S FOX"D UP

RANDY LINN FAX NEWS FOLLOWER

Surprise, angry old white man watches Faux News and commits hate crime. An Indiana man has been convicted of setting fire to a mosque in Ohio. He had told the judge prior to being found guilty that he committed the crimes because Fox News and right wing hate radio had convinced him that “most Muslims are terrorists.”

Does anyone else enjoy the irony that Faux news blames violence on video games without proof, yet there's proof here that Faux news leads people to violent behavior?

The FCC should require the cable channel to display in their scroll; A disclaimer stating:

"The people and views presented in this television program are purely fictional, any coincidence with real people or real events is completely unintentional and coincidental".

This is your mind on Fux Ewes readers, don' let your mind be caught on Fixed Noise!



NFTOS
Editor-In-Chief
Roger West

STEVEN CROWDER; ANDY BREITBART WOULD BE PROUD

Steven Crowder Gets A Well Deserved Face Wash!

Faux News has been raging over the airwaves with reports and interviews surrounded by what they are characterizing as a unprovoked assault, and assault on one of their own "contributors" - by a bunch of “leftist union thugs”. Unfortunately for The American Taliban, a simple review of their own raw video footage clearly shows Crowder knocking a union member to the ground, who in turn leveled several punches back at Crowder. And rightly so!


FOX UN-EDITED

Steven Crowder, the Fox News contributor and Breitbart acolyte who admits he went to Lansing, Michigan union protests looking for trouble and is now touting, with a lot of help from Fox News, a highly-edited video showing him getting punched by “union thugs,” was on Hannity again last night. But this time, there was another guest who accused Crowder of pushing the man to the ground first. Hannity denied that happened. But Crowder never did.


The New York Times reported:

Unfortunately for Mr. Crowder, a look at the video broadcast on the Sean Hannity show appears to show quite clearly that he left out an important section of the footage when he put together his edit. A section of the Fox News broadcast preserved by the Web site Mediaite shows that Mr. Hannity’s producers at Fox News started the clip five seconds earlier than Mr. Crowder did. What the extra footage reveals is the man who punched Mr. Crowder being knocked to the ground seconds before and then getting up and taking a swing at the comedian.

There is one more anomaly in Mr. Crowder’s edit of the footage shot by his associates. The still frame he used for the clip’s title image on YouTube, which offers a much clearer image of the man punching him, was obviously shot by a second camera, from an entirely different angle than the rest of the footage he presented of the man hitting him. If Mr. Crowder wants to clear up the mystery of exactly what happened just before he was punched, it might make sense for him to release any footage of the incident shot from that second angle.

Steven Crowder, like the dead Andrew Breitbart, is not so great at editing videos. You would think that these asshats would better trained [as film makers and editors] before releasing second grade workmanship, but knowing the dead Breitbart, he would be proud of his protégé , would be tweeting away about raping the poor Crowder - publishing blogs for years on how Crowder was man-handled by a more manly man than he.



ANDY IN BETTER TIMES




Crowder's footage has obviously been edited to cut out a portion where he pushes the man to the ground. Notice the choppy edit at 0:38.



 CROWDER'S EDITED VERSION




We have learned much over time, and the list is long, a list of radical tea baggers whom would toss their own flesh under the bus for 15 minutes of fame, or to portray the Democrats in an bad light: Breitbart.com et al, Dana Loesch, Chris Crowder, James O'Keefe, Sean Hannity, Ann Coulter, Glenn Beck would be a few whom have few scruples when it comes to reporting on "leftist socialist".

Crowder went on Fux Ewes the very night of his pummeling and was seen stammering about threats of arrests, bounty money to find the man whom kicked his ass, to challenge the man to a sanctioned cage match fight.......hopefully Crowder fights better inside an octagon rather than how poor he did at the Union busting rally, as his cowering girlish antics in Michigan would certainly garner him a much bigger and sever ass whipping! I would pay much to see someone legally beat the shit out of Steven Crowder!

Hey Steven Crowder, "Hey Mr. America", in the most famous words of your beloved mentor.......behave yourself, behave yourself you freak, stop raping the videos! You filthy, filthy freak, stop raping the videos.

 

 Steven Crowder, this weeks worst person in the world!

 

 

 

 

 

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West

 

 

INTELLIGENCE QUOTA INSTITUTE CONFIRMS THAT FAUX NEWS VIEWERS DUMBER THAN MOST

IQ INST SAYS FAUX NEWS VIEWERS A DUMB LOT

Study shows that the Americans who watch Fox News have an average IQ of 80, whereas the national average is 100. Researchers were not "shocked" by findings.

Birmingham, Alabama (PRWEB) December 04, 2012

The results of a 4 year study show that Americans who obtain their news from Fox News channel have an average IQ of 80, which represents a 20 point deficit when compared to the U.S. national average of 100. IQ, or intelligence quotient, is the international standard of assessing intelligence.

Researchers at The Intelligence Institute, a conservative non-profit group, tested 5,000 people using a series of tests that measure everything from cognitive aptitude to common sense and found that people who identified themselves as Fox News viewers and 'conservative' had, on average, significantly lower intelligent quotients. Fox Viewers represented 2,650 members of the test group.

One test involved showing subjects a series of images and measuring their vitals, namely pulse rate and blood pressure. The self-identified conservatives' vitals increased over 35% when shown complex or shocking images. The image that caused the most stress was a poorly edited picture of President Obama standing next to a "ghostly" image of a child holding a tarantula.

Test subjects who received their news from other outlets or reported they do not watch the news scored an average IQ of 104, compared to 80 for Fox News viewers.

Lead researcher, P. Nichols, explains:

"Less intelligent animals rely on instinct when confronted by something which they do not understand. This is an ancient survival reaction all animals, including humans, exhibit. It's a very simple phenomenon, really; think about a dog being afraid of a vacuum cleaner. He doesn't know what a vacuum is or if it may harm him, so he becomes agitated and barks at it. Less intelligent humans do the same thing. Concepts that are too complex for them to understand, may frighten or anger them."

He continues, "Fox News' content is presented at an elementary school level and plays directly into the fears of the less educated and less intelligent."

The researchers said that an IQ of 80 is well above the score of 70, which is where psychiatrists diagnose mental retardation. P. Nichols says an IQ of 80 will not limit anyone's ability to lead happy, fulfilling lives.

The study did not conclude if Fox News contributed to lowering IQ or if it attracts less intelligent humans.

P. Nichols concludes that he wasn't shocked by the studies' results, rather how dramatic their range:

"Several previous studies show that self-identified conservatives are less intelligent than self-identified moderates. We have never seen such a homogeneous group teetering so close to special needs levels."
 

NFTOS
Editor-In-Chief
Roger West

WAR ON CHRISTMAS

It's that most wonderful time of year when Fox News starts drumming up the case for a "War on Christmas," and Jon Stewart isn't putting up with it anymore. Host Gretchen Carlson asked on air whether she was "nuts" to think the war was real, and on last night's Daily Show, Stewart was happy to set her straight: "Yes, you're f--king nuts." Sure, Faux News can scrounge for isolated moments of anti-Christmas spirit, but "the rest of us can't swing a dead elf without knocking over an inflatable snow globe or a giant blinking candy cane," Stewart bellows.

And Christmas, which used to last just one day, "like birthdays do," is only growing: This year, Black Friday expanded into Black Thursday, "or as we used to call it, Thanksgiving. Christmas is so big now, it's eating other holidays," Stewart proclaims. "Watch your ass, Halloween, you're next!"

The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
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The Daily Show with Jon Stewart
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NFTOS
Editor-In Chief
Roger West

THE SILENCE IS DEAFENING

FIXED NOISE AVOIDS RAPE COMMENTS BY GOP

Indiana GOP Senate candidate Richard Mourdock ignited a media firestorm after he called pregnancies that result from rape “a gift from God.” Mourdock stood by his comments during a press conference Wednesday morning. The outcry has elicited defenses from the "binders full O' women" campaign and the teapublican Senate Campaign Committee, while other teabillies including Sen. Kelly Ayotte (R-NH) and Indiana gubernatorial candidate Mike Pence distanced themselves from Mourdock. Yet, amidst the hubbub, Faux News has chosen to stay silent on the controversy.

As of 1:30 pm today, Faux News had not mentioned Richard Mourdock or the word “rape” in connection to Mourdock even once. In comparison, other cable networks are covering Mourdock and the fallout from his comments exhaustively. MSNBC mentioned “rape” in 15 segments about Mourdock, while CNN mentioned it 22 times.

CABLE NEWS RAPE REPORT BY THE NUMBERS

Silence seems to be Fixed Noises favored tactic for dealing with stories that may be unpalatable for conservatives. When Rep. Todd Akin (R-MO) made his highly-covered blunder, claiming that women could not get pregnant from “legitimate rape,” Faux barely mentioned his name. Though Fux Ewes may continue to ignore these controversies, stories of teapublican candidates’ extreme positions on abortion and contraception are becoming all too common in the news cycle.

UPDATE:

Refuse

Faith Leaders

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West

LOW - INFORMATION VOTERS

Low-Information Voters LIV's 

“If you’re one of the 5 percent of American voters who are still undecided on who to vote for, it’s okay to admit you just don’t really give a shit. Seriously, if you still can’t figure out who you like more –Mitt Romney or Barrack Obama– stay home… because you probably couldn’t find your polling place anyway. I mean, what more information does someone need to make this choice? Obama has been President for nearly four years. And Mitt Romney has been running for President since 1971, when his space egg incubated and he burst out of an astronaut’s chest.” ~ Bill Maher


Is there a bigger hoax around than the teapublican party? All charm and promise - though the nuts and bolts may be a bit harsher reality. Will the lies work? They sure hope so, because the tea party enthusiasts could not possibly win without this block of voters - which is a "special" group: The "low-information voters," or LIVs, a term that keeps popping up of late.

The term is mainly used to refer to those who vote conservative against their interests. Given the recent media coverage about "low-information" voters we thought at NFTOS - that we'd educate those Americans who rely on talk radio and less-than-factual hearsay from friends and family members to shape their political decisions.

Mitt Romney is going hard after these unlettered voters in a handful of swing states — voters who are considered critical to winning the election. Bill Maher has a better take on these unlettered voters, watch below:





Now enter the uninformed voter. Twenty-five percent of Americans are functionally illiterate. Ninety percent get their news from corporate TV. Too many think Iraq attacked us on 9/11, that Barack is a Muslim, that Medicare and welfare are bankrupting the country. The uninformed voter doesn't seem to care that their only source of information is Fixed Noise, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity and Ann 'the man" Coulter:

FOX LIES

FAUX LIES

FIXED NOISE LIES





The unlettered voter is trained to worship capitalism, even as his own personal wealth declines.

Civics, history and geography have all but disappeared from our schools. The American Taliban loves this type of base- a dumber lot if you will, this way, it makes it easier to blame Obama.

In short , LIV's are a precious commodity and must be cultivated carefully, how better to do so than though a clumsily disguised "news network" - to pipe in the nonsense? LIV's are responsible for their own ignorance, and if they're getting most of their "information" from Faux News then may God help us all.

Information literacy and facts are becoming more and more important in an ever expanding world of chaos. Many tea party enthusiasts watch Faux News with a high level of fervency, ir-regaurdless of truth or facts. And with every Faux News talking head [Hannity, O'Reilly, Malakin, Coulter], they become more hopelessly clueless about what's going on around them. The creed of right wing media is to lie, and deceive frequently, you know, feed the hungry wolves as much red meat as you can so as to ensure a dumber base, one whom can be manipulated easily - even when they know its truly better to tell the truth poorly than to lie well.

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West

MEDIA FIRESTORM

Veteran newsman Ted Koppel appeared as a special contributor to NBC’s “Rock Center” on Thursday to launch an apparent war on what he believes is “partisan ranting” masquerading as news coverage at Fox News, MSNBC and other partisan media.

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

I disagree with Koppel on many issues, MSNBC's afternoon and evening shows do not pretend to be news; they are pure unadulterated commentary. Faux News pretends to be news, but is also commentary. That is a major difference. One can live with both so long as there is no deception. Fixed Noise deceives. Fair and balanced it is not. News it is not.

MSNBC is open about what its shows are, and it does not invoke "fear" in its viewership with lies, incendiary rhetoric, "Egypt Caliphate conspiracy theories", nor does it have a "Michelle Malakin", whom often is spitting, seething and drooling into the camera every night.








Looking back on TV history, this type point/counter point began long ago starting with shows like "Meet the Press" "McLaughlin Group" and "60 minutes" - that showed there was an actual market for this political discussion in addition to gotcha journalism.

Blaming MSNBC for "degenerating " politics is ridiculous. Saying that it has effected the ability for Congress to do it's job is more than ridiculous. The reality is, news is a business. What people are craving now is honest news, commentary based on facts - not full of fecal matter.

There was a basic false equivalency in comparing MSNBC to Fixed News, and that difference is Roger Ailes and Rupert Murdoch. Anyone who has seen the documentary film "Outfoxed" knows that what Faux does differs fundamentally from how MSNBC operates.

OUTFOXED



Faux News lies and uses predetermined talking points that come from the corporate suites - the opinions on MSNBC are those of the individual commentators. Furthermore, the standards of people Koppel threw under the bus are far loftier than the hacks on Faux News. Political voices like Rachel Maddow, Ed Shultz, Rev. and Al Sharpton [MSNBC] use facts to express opinion, not political directives from on high.

The piece also made a false equivalency in trashing the many straight news journalists that are to be found on MSNBC for most of the daytime broadcasting schedule. It was unfair to people such as Chuck Todd, Tamron Hall, Thomas Roberts, Alex Witt, Andrea Mitchell and others who present straight news. You will never find Faux news minions with the same journalistic professionalism.

While MSNBC may have a liberal slant in its opinions, it does not make up crap out of whole cloth like Faux News.

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West

BULL SHIT MOUNTAIN

In case you missed it, Jon Stewart delivered what may be the best 10 minutes and 27 seconds you'll see on TV this entire campaign season. Stop what you're doing and watch it now! 

Mitt Romney hasn't been having the best week. A leaked video of seemingly classist remarks he made during a fundraiser in May has caused a media firestorm, and his campaign has taken a major hit as a result.

The Daily Show
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The Daily Show
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

The Daily Show
Get More: Daily Show Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,The Daily Show on Facebook

See, the whole scandal won't look so career-ending if you just scramble to find a flattering angle.

NFTOS

Editor-In-Chief

Roger West